The Stuff

The Shield starts up again in a few days (Sept. 2), and I’ve been watching these Shield interviews in preparation.

The Shield airs on the FX channel, which is owned by Rupert Murdoc, who also owns FOX News. Evil! Ah, but the darker the berry, the sweeter the juice.

Crackle.com has all the Rescue Me Minisodes in case you missed them. New full-length ’sodes don’t start until next year, but another great FX show, The Shield, starts next week.

Laura Palmer’s father is on TAEAG,GJ tonight.

Business Hugs! Learn the correct way to hug in the business work place.

OK. 99% of my friends have made the exodus to Facebook. I made the jump, and then gave up on it. I hated the quizzes. MySpace is horrible because it crashes on almost every pageload, and generally speaking, it’s a visual atrocity. Today… today MySpace was bacon themed, or really Wendy’s Baconator themed. The bacon-strip background, combined with the fact they’ve whored the site out for my favorite fast food sangwish — too sublime for words.

Basically, if I didn’t think it would kill me inside of 3 years I would eat about 20 Baconators a week.

Surprised Wal*Mart doesn’t carry these Bigfoot Refrigerators. Maybe they do.

More iPhone humor. The new Bakelite model.

I enjoyed this video, Silent Shadow of the Bat-Man. It was created by film maker Andre Perkowski by cutting and pasting from over 15 films. Watch it undistracted, and in the dark.

Why pay for chicken eggs when you can make your own? Try MyEggs.

Tonight, I was drinking bloody Marys and watching the Shark Week shows I had on my DVR, and they were talking about how sharks could smell 1 part blood in 1,000,000 parts of water. So I started to think: just how extraordinary is that really? Then I thought about farts, and how accurate a humans’ smell was. First I had to figure out how big a fart was. I found this site (http://www.heptune.com/farts.html) that says humans produce a half a liter of flatus a day, and on average humans fart 14 times a day. That means the average fart has a volume of 2.2 cubic inches (had to do some math — well really, this web page did the math http://www.onlineconversion.com/). I’ve smelled farts that creeped up stair cases, and across gymnasiums, but to be fair, we’ve all smelled farts from across school classrooms, so to detect the human’s ability to detect farts, I needed to determine the volume of a classroom. Figure that the classic high-school classroom is 9′x20′x20′ — that’s 3600 cubic feet, or 6,220,800 cubic inches. To be fair, lets say humans and desks take up 1/3 of the room, and that the volume of room available to fart expansion is 4,000,000 cubic inches. If we divide 2.2 cubic inches of fart by 4,000,000, we find that the human can detect 1 part of fart in 1.8 million parts of air. That’s better than the shark’s ability to sense blood in water.

Granted my math, science, and logic might be off — but my excuse is that I’m drunk. Booya!