Just think: if you vote for the right politicians (is there such a thing), then they’ll bring prosperity to Gothtropolis and rid the town of crime. Here’s the good part: with no criminals to fight, Spidey can relax, and you’ll be spared 3 hour movies featuring dance numbers. Just kidding, the Spidey films are long but they ‘ight — I can’t dis the director that made the Evil Dead films.
I used to watch Magnum, P.I. back in the 1980s. Yep, not re-runs — new episodes. Looking back, the show was kind of weird and corny, but back in the day, when there were only 6 channels to choose from, it was the best thing to watch during its particular time slot.
Some advice: don’t tuck in your Hawaiian shirts, don’t hang out with old people with crazy birds, and don’t hang out with millionaires that pretend to be butlers.
Voting has become real down and dirty business (or at least NOT allowing people to vote has). Double and triple check your voter registration status with your town before the big day to avoid any surprises.
Contact your municipality for:
1) Where you are to vote on election day
2) That your information has been updated (have you moved? / changed your name via marriage / etc.)
Fans of the Ali G show will remember Sasha Baron Cohen’s Bruno character. Bruno was a fashion model and commentator. Not my favorite character, but they’re making a Bruno movie now, so Sasha is showing up random places as Bruno, presumably to get footage for the film. Here’s his latest stunt.
The town I live in is about 4 miles long, 500 feet wide, and has more than ten bars. About once a week I walk downtown to purchase goods, visit the library or drink either coffee or booze. My two mile walk downtown and back affords morons an opportunity to scream nonsense at me, typically from Jeeps. I don’t know what it is about Jeeps, but they’re definitely the choice vehicle of morons. So far this summer I’ve been called “faggot”, “pussy”, “hey”, and various words that sound like portmanteaus of Italian lunch meats and Anglo-Saxon cuss words. The thing is they never stop. They never give me the opportunity to gouge their eyes out with my thumbs, or at least bind them and sell them into white slavery. Sigh.
Saturday someone in a Jeep slowed down and yelled “Donkey Kong” at me, and then stopped they Jeep about 100 feet in front of me. For once I wasn’t offended — in fact I was amused. First, I do look like Donkey Kong. I’m 6′3″, weight 275 pounds and have a 56″ chest and a 42″ waist. Second, Donkey Kong is cool — cooler than Mario, or Pac Man or even Sonic. Maybe cooler than Konker, or even Crash Bandicoot. Once I got within 20 feet of their Jeep, they sped away. No other yells, no middle fingers. Nothing. Oh well — now I have a new nickname. Or maybe Drunky Kong. I like that better.
Quentin Tarantino makes very entertaining films, BUT all of them borrow from other films. His sources are well documented, so there’s no sense in chronicling them here. He’s kind of like Elvis or the Rolling Stones, who borrowed influences from black American musicians, made their own version of the music, and brought it to the white, suburban masses. Quentin, a one-time video store clerk, took his rich knowledge of obscure films and used that knowledge to create his own films.
I hadn’t seen this trailer for They Call Her One Eye until this week, but it’s clear that it was an inspiration for Daryl Hanna and Uma Thurman’s characters in Kill Bill. It’s brutal (remember: you cannot unsee, what you’ve seen).
Ultimately Quentin’s homages are justifiable because they breath new life into the original works, and expose them to people who would have never had a chance to see them.
This is how lazy I’ve become: so lazy that if I had the gun from Portal I would use it my make a portal between the kitchen and “couch island”. So lazy that I used Paint.Net to make the image below rather than walking up 12 stairs to use Photoshop (which is expensive, but better).
Here’s a warning to the youth: once you’re old(er) and have a goodly amount of money, don’t just use it to entertain yourself.
In the 1980s William Shatner made a documentary called Vegetarian World. Vegetarianism is nothing to take lightly; you really need to do your research, and your really need to learn how to cook for yourself before you try it. If you start without preparation, you’ll probably become disappointed by weight gain, lack of energy, or lack of choices, and then go back to eating Ham & Cheese Hot Pockets and Wendy’s Baconators.
A few months ago I saw Ricky Gervais perform his comedy routine in Manhattan. He’s as clever a stand-up comedian as he was in the Office. Ricky wasn’t always a comedian; about 24 years ago he was the singer for a David Bowie/Ministry-esque 80’s band called Seona Dancing. Here’s a video of the band:
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