The Stuff

I love gift cards — to me they say “I cared enough to not waste your time at the return counter of Macy’s”. The economy is less than healthy and many businesses are going out of business, SO make sure you use your gift cards up while they still got juice on them. Know what I’m sayin’?

Here’s a list of troubled businesses having issues:

Circuit City (filed Chapter 11)
Ann Taylor- 117 stores nationwide closing
Lane Bryant, Fashion Bug ,and Catherine’s to close 150 stores
nationwide
Eddie Bauer to close stores 27 stores and more after January
Cache will close all stores
Talbots closing down specialty stores
J. Jill closing all stores (owned by Talbots)
Pacific Sunwear (also owned by Talbots)
GAP closing 85 stores
Footlocker closing 140 stores mo re to close after January
Wickes Furniture closing down
Levitz closing down remaining stores
Bombay closing remaining stores
Zales closing down 82 stores and 105 after January
Whitehall closing all stores
Piercing Pagoda closing all stores
Disney closing 98 stores and will close more after January.
Home Depot closing 15 stores 1 in NJ ( New Brunswick )
Macys to close 9 stores after January
Linens and Things closing all stores
Movie Galley Closing all stores
Pep Boys Closing 33 stores
Sprint/Nextel closing 133 stores
JC Penney closing a number of stores after January
Ethan Allen closing down 12 stores.
Wilson Leather closing down all stores
Sharper Image closing down all stor~s
K B Toys closing 356 stores
Loews to close down some stores
Dillard’s to close some stores

Should The Government Stop Dumping Money Into A Giant Hole?… An obvious satire of the $quad-trillion bailout currently going on. The Onion: still funny in the 21st century.

In The Know: Should The Government Stop Dumping Money Into A Giant Hole?

“I love the money fires”!

MSNBC talker Joe Scarborough drops the Fuck Bomb on live TV. Funny. Sounds like Joe needs an extra cup of Joe. Blames Ambien.

Candid video of FOX talker Laura Ingraham miserable in between shooting segments. It’s amazing a well oiled machine like FOX News can be so disorganized. “The word ‘the’ is spelled wrong in the prompter”. Love it.

With the market in the toilet, and companies like Apple down over 50%, all you can do is cry laugh.

Here’s some funny from an aquaintence:

Liquid Assets

If you purchased $1,000 of Delta Airlines stock 1 year ago, you would have $49.00 today.

If you purchased $1,000 of AIG stock one year ago, you would have $33.00 today.

If you purchased $1,000 of Lehman Brothers stock 1 year ago, you would have $0.00 today.

But, if you purchased $1,000 worth of beer 1 year ago, drank all the beer, returned the aluminum cans for a recycling refund, you would have $214.00.

Based on the above, the best current investment plan is to drink heavily & recycle. It is called the 401-Keg.

A recent study found that the average American walks about 900 miles a year.

Another study found that Americans drink, on average, 22 gallons of alcohol a year.

That means that, on average, Americans get about 41 miles to the gallon!

Makes you proud to be an American!

The first part of the joke is funny if you live in a state where containers have recycling refunds. New Jersey doesn’t have refunds — instead, towns reap the recycling profits and spend it on stuff which I think is worthless like hockey rinks.