The Stuff

Hey! Happy Thanksgiving to all you United States Americans!

Last time I drank Wild Turkey around the Thanksgiving holiday I ended up in jail. Jail, I can assure you, is not boring, but it is miserable and humiliating.

So, have an exciting time this holiday, but not at the potential expense and misery of yourself and others. Never drink and drive.

BTW, you can mitigate any potential boring situations tomorrow by following this handy list:

1. Have your notebook computer handy with plenty of games and DVDs to amuse yourself with. Substitute notebook with PSP, Game Boy, iPhone, etc., if you have one. Always remember to bring your power cord, controller, blank CDRs, and anything else you might need.
2. Give a hoot: read a book.
3. Drive to your destination solo, so you can escape whenever you need to.
4. Hide all those boring board (bored) games and card games.
5. Take full advantage of the turkey Tryptophan myth, and take a long, socially acceptable nap. Remember: napping is a form of time travel, that can get you through the most boring situations.
6. Offer to walk the dog (remember: at night your don’t have to clean up the poop).
7. Smoke?

I’m out of ideas for now — off to do something fun.